Welcome to my website, and this, my first blog post. As I write the sky is grey and heavy, everything outside is saturated, the rain has stopped for a moment. Molly, my beautiful Bichon Frise, is asleep at my feet, and I know when she wakes up I will have to take her for a walk, irrespective of whether or not the rain returns. What should I do in the meantime? How should I fill this quiet moment? I have a long to do list. I should be writing, or editing, or reading, or cleaning (!), … and I should be making plans for our new home! There it goes – once again my heart skips a beat.
Being a fairly pragmatic person (for the best part), I find it surprising that I have always been nervous of change. I like what I know, I like what I have, but then I always have. In the fifty plus years I’ve been on this earth, my life like most others has seen nothing but change. A new school, a first date, walking through the door of my new job, getting married, having children, being promoted, being made redundant, and gulp … publishing my first novel. With the exception of only a few years, something which affects my everyday life will change on a fairly regular basis. Everything changes, it must. Yet, when change knocks at my door, even change for the better, change which I welcome, I still feel nervous.
So, here I am, spring has been and gone, summer is trying to settle in, and a large board outside my house announces it’s sold! On top of that, I am also supposed to be working on a website – I know I should have one, I should also write a regular blog – but will I get it right? The nerves are back.Deep breath … and move forward. And do you know what? When I look back on all the changes in my life, most of them have been for the best.
Sometimes that ‘best’ is not immediately, but discovered in the fullness of time, I admit I simply couldn’t see it at the time, and I know I should embrace it. Change is coming whether I want it or not, so I may as well throw open my arms and pull it close. Help point it in the direction I’d prefer, mould it into the life I want to live, and take it as a challenge, not the huge obstacle I tend to imagine was coming my way.
If you are reading this, it means the website is up and running and this is my first blog post. It may now be that summer is on its way out, and I may be living in this house or a new one. But without a shadow of a doubt, change has happened, and I survived it again. I’m still sitting here communicating with people. Some of those people are my nearest and dearest, others are cyber friends from Facebook and Twitter, and some will be readers who have taken the time and effort to contact me. Whoever you are, and however you happen to be reading this, I hope you too embrace the changes that face you, even if it is only to lessen the impact you think they may have, or indeed have had. A lovely lady once told me that I should do something that frightens me every now and again. Firstly, because I should challenge my fears, and secondly, because the exhilaration once done, would remind me I’m still alive and capable of things I never thought possible. I took her advice in the past and published Misplaced Loyalty, and here I am a couple of years later with a website. Who’d have thought? Not I.
I am now going to embrace this house move, and build a new home somewhere or other, then settle back down to get on with life, probably with my fingers crossed that the next change is still some way off.